Saturday, January 22, 2011

Reversal of Roles

It's been a while since I've talked to my friends about my life and my past. They remember me as this girl who was a bit of a manhater but could get a man on his knees. *blushing* I was always declaring that I would never get married and all that. I probably still won't but now I am not entirely against the whole idea of getting hitched.

The only thing is that I want to marry an honest man.

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is the hardest man to find in all of Earthlinglandia. Present a man to me and I am sure that I can make him tell me a lie in no time. People lie constantly. Even the best of men hide the truth in order to spare the feelings of people that they care about. I am a firm believer that the reason why I have become as blunt and socially awkward was a result of my many years as a pathological liar. But I have worked out most of my issues and have become an even worse version of who I was. I became a person who wants to be blatantly honest. I lie to people I don't like or don't care about. But for the most part, for the people I like and care about, I tell them the truth.

I would not recommend bringing me along when you go shopping. You might not like what I would have to say about the outfit that you want to buy. ^^;

I am sad that my friend, who has been hopping to find a real and lasting love, had her heart broken by a man who didn't realize how wonderful she was until it was too late. Or maybe he hasn't realized it and is still thinking that he is better off without her. Who knows how jerks operate?

I might even consider being okay with the wedding movies addict over the new less marriage positive her. But like how I was before, I thought, why would it be a waste of time if one is having so much fun. I admit, I had a lot of fun being in love with all of my exes and playing with the other guys we met in college. But I don't want her to wake up one morning like I did and wishing that she had found herself a better suited person. But I like the one she is with now. I just don't know how well they suit each other.
I want her to be safe and happy. But those two things don't always go together. Adventure, danger is always associated with adrenaline rush and excitement. It seems a lot more fun than just being at home blogging about a life that has nothing in it.

I have always said that Boredom would be the end of me. But somehow, I find that it might not be as bad I supposed it would be. I have every plan to be a good partner for that honest man that I would find, if he can be found. Otherwise, I would not be as lost as I was before. I won't be afraid of love and commitment. Just a little bit, the normal kind, the one that can be overcome easily with the support of another person, that honest man I was talking to you about.

All else that he needs to learn, how to please, pleasure and to enjoy things that I love can be learned but honesty, that in itself, I think one needs to be born with. Don't you think so?

You are not a bad person if you lie often. If you are following your true nature, then it is not a crime. As for me, I will try to lie to myself less and less so I can have a better more honest idea of how to live my life to the fullest.

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